Monkey Brains
"Unknown Artist" Angry Monkey 002 
Monday, October 23, 2006, 06:46 PM - Angry Monkey
Posted by Administrator
What's up with small bands that act like they are such rock stars and seem to think that they are playing some huge venue when in fact they are just playing some small club where prob no one has ever heard of them and then when these bands do have some sort of following they think that they are like the rolling stones playing at Madison Square Garden or some place similar. You can never ask these guys for IDs or a "Band Stamp" cause YOU are supposed to know who they are already for some reason cause in their minds its the first night the venue is open and they are the only band that has ever played there. Here is a rule of thumb actually become a rock star before you start acting like one then you might actually get treated like a rock star and not some dumb ass musician.

AM
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"Buy Back Tipping" Drunken Monkey 005 
Sunday, October 22, 2006, 12:19 AM - Drunken Monkey
Posted by Administrator
Not tipping on a buy back or a free drink is not just plain wrong it should be against the law and is most definatively a sin. It's assholes that don't tip on buy backs that ruin it for everyone else, cause when a bartender doesn't get tipped on a buy back, they then wonder why bother at all with buy backs or free drinks. Does it not make any sense that if you are supposed to tip on a drink you pay for, you should then show some appreciation for a free one? This is like some sort of alien philosophy to some people. If you just saved the price of a drink ($4 - $8) then tip $2 you would have still tipped $1 why not throw an extra buck to say thanks for saving me money.... you cheap fuck. Don't be a sinner and sacrifice that dollar to the bartender gods, otherwise you will get crappy drinks and slow service and that's a guaranteed.

Now the only exception to the rule is if you get a free drink you didn't ask for. In that case its OK not to tip because he no one ever said they should pay for something they didn't ask for, but then it would still be a nice gesture to leave something :).

DM
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Web Monkey 003 
Friday, October 20, 2006, 12:59 PM - Web Monkey
Posted by Administrator
Run & Fall.

WM
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"Open Hours"Monkey See 004 
Tuesday, October 17, 2006, 08:52 PM - Monkey See
Posted by Administrator
If a place closes at 7:00 do you arrive at 6:59 and complain about them still being open or even worse are you one of the people who arrives at 7:05 and says "but its only 7:05" Do any of these people ever take into consideration that maybe the closing time is also quitting time? How would they like it if people went to their job (and I am stereotyping here) asked them to work in their cubical for another 15 min after 5 pm? I don't think they would like it much. Now a sure way to not get anyone to maybe bend the rules for you is to throw a hissy fit and complain about how its only 5 minutes after closing. ITS AFTER CLOSING TIME!! rule of thumb if you need to get somewhere by a certain time then try and be there 15 minutes before it closes that should be enough time for whom ever to do whatever it is you need them to do, otherwise try getting there when the place opens and I am sure they wont have to close at that time.

MS
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Web Monkey 002 
Tuesday, October 17, 2006, 12:55 PM - Web Monkey
Posted by Administrator
Ride Donald.
Click on image to see bigger.

WM
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"Commute Bigot" Monkey See 003 
Monday, October 16, 2006, 09:30 PM - Monkey See
Posted by Administrator
I had to ride the LIRR today and was on the platform waiting at one of the stations for a transfer and overheard some "real nuah yokars" making fun of the station announcers way of talking. He was a person which seemed to me from his accent probably from India or some country in that region. His accent was pretty thick and gave these morons just a great kick when imitating him. Now I think that if you are going to make fun of someone's way of speaking English you should really listen to yourself speak it first. These idiots sounded worse when they were talking to each other then when they were making fun of the guy. Not to say that the New York accent is bad but we all know its not too flattering. I take it that the further you go into long island the closer I will find my self on an episode of "All in the Family"

MS
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"Happy Hour" Drunken Monkey 004 
Sunday, October 15, 2006, 11:41 AM - Drunken Monkey
Posted by Administrator
Here is a few tips about happy hour.

When its buy one get one free... do I need to spell it out for you its BUY one get one free, not GET one free then buy one. Pay for your fucking drinks and then ask for the free one. I don't understand people who ask for a drink during happy hour , don't pay for it then ask for the free one. I mean you expect a free and free happy hour?

Usually when its buy one get one free it is not so that you can buy one and give the free one to someone else (you cheap bastards), it is for you and your friend to both buy one and both get one free, so that you can both get wasted. Stop living like you are a European collage student staying at hostels and living off bread and refilling your nasty water bottle.

Also ....TIP ON THE BUY BACK !!!! you're getting a free drink show some appreciation and help the bartender pay her/his rent.

DM
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